Finally, this nice, round number is here. I wanted to stop at 100, but I felt there is more to say, I felt the need to continue.
Now, I think it’s really over. I don’t think I have anything else to say. In two hundred days people finish books that inspire millions, people finish screenplays for movies, in 200 hundred days lives change. My life changed too, in 200 days, but I am disappointed. I was hoping for more.
So, although the outside circumstances are nothing to write home about, I did learn some new techniques that helped me make through the most difficult period in my life which was the last two months.
But that was not the idea. The idea was to experience nice things and not to learn how to make it through rough times. I don’t want rough times any more. I’m tired of rough times. Yes, I can make it through, but hey?! Wtf?!
I don’t know. On several occasions it appeared to me that maybe I could proclaim the rough times to be the good ones. Just make a proclamation. Force the feeling. It is possible to do that but it doesn’t seem right.
Anyways, this little “project” is now finished. I think I may come back from time to time and maybe add a thought or two, but that’s about it.
If the goal was to stop worrying, well, I almost got there. I definitely made some improvement in this regard. I do worry less, but … something is still missing. And that’s nice surprises. Effortless joy.
Breathe, smile, enjoy the day.
Over and out.